Confused and alone

Over the last couple months I have isolated myself from writing either on my blog, very little in My books or even a little poetry. I have been lost and confused as to what the Lord wants me to do in His service. Then the covid dilemma happened and my despair became worst. I do suffer from depression and take medication, but this overwhelming cloud that consumed me is and was more than depression. The question I have is “Where is the road?”

I’m fasting today, praying continually, and trying to find my way. I took time as usual in the morning for devotions, I went to church and partook of communion, I talked with a close Christian friend, and posted a question on Facebook in a special group about being a chaplain. I’m reaching in all directions for answers. Maybe the Lord through one of these sources I can get some guidance.

I love to read my devotions every morning. First I read the daily devotional in a publication called “Mediations “. It is published by Northwestern Publishers. I then open my Bible and read a chapter or two where my book mark is, I just keep reading the Bible through over and over. Next comes a psalm from the book of Psalms. I read and memorize a Bible verse(s) of the day. I end with prayer. In my prayer I include all and special request I received.

I go to church at Our Savior Evangelical Lutheran Church Grafton, Wisconsin. The church has a large gym or family center, as it also called. We can sit apart and social distance for Covid safety. With the communion we do a continuous distribution. After all are seated the pastor give the communion blessing and dismissal. We have two services 8 and 10:30 with the second being live streamed.

I had stopped at my friend’s house after church. We talked briefly and said I would be back. I went home changed into some more comfortable clothes. I took JD out to do his duty outside. Then I sat to watch a little TV. I didn’t feel right to back to my friend immediately. When I did walk over the other guests were gone. We talked, I drank some water, we consoled each other. He was having his own issues and he said he had just finished a conversation with Jesus (prayer). Prayers can be simply like talking with a friend. God is easy to reach through prayer. I came away with our time comforted. Our time ended and was interrupted by a young raccoon.

My Facebook post has not garnered many reactions yet. I’ll give it time. I know the Lord has his time and I’m sure the right response will come at Jesus’ timing and direction. I have had many instances in my life that happened at just the right moment. I feel this will be no different. Just be ready.

Just from the input I have had today I know that being Chaplain of the HOG chapter is an important step and course to follow. I feel lighter now looking back on today’s course that Jesus is leading me. Writing this article has improved my vision for now. I pray the Lord continue His work through me. God is here. God be with us all

David Spietz